Sardar on a cycle hit a lady accidently
Lady:Break nahi mar sakta kya,Khotay?
Sardar: pori cycle to mardi ab break kahaa se marun?.....
Sardarji ap ko kabi kisi se pyar hua?
Han yar! Per wo manti hi nahi!
"Kia kehti hay?"
"Kehti hay
'I LOVE U 2'
pata nahi ye dosra kon hay.
Santa & Banta got tired of mobile & decide 2 use pigeons. 1day a pigeon reaches Banta without message. Angry Banta calls Santa!
Santa: Oye, this was a missed call.
What's Ford?
Santa: Gaadi.
What's Oxford?
Santa: So simple, Bail Gaadi.
Captain of Military: Naujawano aage bado;
Santa aage nahi bada;
Captain: tum aage kyu nahi bade?
Santa: Apne kaha 9 jawano aage bado, mein 10ve num pe tha!!
Santa Singh: What is the full form of singh?
Banta Singh: S-santa I-insaan N-nahi G-gadha H-hai.
Santa: My Father Dug The Suez Canal.
Banta: That's Nothing, Have You Heard Of Dead Sea?
Santa: Yes, I Have.
Banta:My Dad Killed It.
How can a Santa kill a Lion?
Santa thinks & thinks hard... & comes to a conclusion:
"I'll drink Poison... and let the Lion eat me."
Santa buys a new Pressure Cooker & next day he returns it.
Shopkeeper: Why are you returnng it?
Santa: Ghar me jawan beti hai, or ye sala seeti bajata hai
Santa 2 Police: Kal rath chor mere ghar se TV ke alava sab samaan le gaye
Police:TV kyon nahi legaya?
Santa:TV to mei dekh raha tha is liye.
Santa Singh ka 20 saal bad bacha hua.
Wo udas ho gaya.
Banta : Yaar udas kion ho?
Santa : 20 sal baad bacha huwa wo bhi itna sa.
Ek banda bhagta howa aata hay aur Santa se kehta hai bhai jaldi jao tumharey ghar main talaab ka pani ghus gaya hay.
Santa: Oye kion jhoot bolta hay, ghar ki chabi to meray paas hay.
American: In our country ,
marriage even takes place with email.
Santa: In India, it is only with a female
A Chini was in hospital.
SANTA went to meet him.
Chini said “CHING CHONG, MOU.CHU CHA” & died.
SANTA went china 2 know the meaning,
that was:-
KUTTE OXYGN K PIPE SE PAIR Utha
Santa found answer to the
most difficult question ever-
What comes first the chicken or the egg ?
O yaar, jiska order pehle doge, vo ayega !
Santa enters a store that sell curtains.
He tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains."
The salesman assured him that they had a large selection of pink curtains. He showed him several patterns, but Santa seemed to be having a hard time choosing.
Finally, he selects a lovely pink floral print.
The salesman asked what size curtains he needed.
Santa replies, "Fifteen inches."
"Fifteen inches?" asked the salesman. "That sounds very small, what room are they for?"
Santa tells him that they aren't for a room, they are for his computer monitor.
The surprised salesman replies, "But, sir, computers do not have curtains!"
Santa says, "Hellllooooooooo........I've got Windows!"
Interviewer : Give me the opposite words.
Banta Singh : Ok
Interviewer : Made in India
Banta Singh : Destroyed in Pakistan
Interviewer : Good… Keep it Up
Banta Singh : Bad…. Put it Down
Interviewer : Maxi Mum
Banta Singh : Mini Dad
Interviewer : Enough! Take your Seat
Banta Singh : Insufficient! Don’t take my seat
Interviewer : Idiot! Take your seat
Banta Singh : Clever! Don’t take my seat
Interviewer : I say you get out!
Banta Singh : You didn’t say I come in
Interviewer : I reject you!
Banta Singh : You appoint me
A lady asked Santa: LIPTON di chah hai?
Santa replied: Mainu ta nahi hai ji, tainu hai ta lipat ja…!
Banta was not home at his usual hour, and his wife, Preeto, was fuming, as the clock ticked later and later. Finally, about 3:00 AM she heard a noise at the front door, and as she stood at the top of the stairs, there was Banta, drunk as a skunk, trying to navigate the stairs.
"Do you realize what time it is?" she asked.
He answered, "Don't get excited. I'm late because I bought something for the house."
Immediately her attitude changed, and as she ran down the stairs to meet him halfway, she asked, "What did you buy for the house, dear?"
Banta's answer was, "A round of drinks!"
Keep Smiling....................
Lady:Break nahi mar sakta kya,Khotay?
Sardar: pori cycle to mardi ab break kahaa se marun?.....
Sardarji ap ko kabi kisi se pyar hua?
Han yar! Per wo manti hi nahi!
"Kia kehti hay?"
"Kehti hay
'I LOVE U 2'
pata nahi ye dosra kon hay.
Santa & Banta got tired of mobile & decide 2 use pigeons. 1day a pigeon reaches Banta without message. Angry Banta calls Santa!
Santa: Oye, this was a missed call.
What's Ford?
Santa: Gaadi.
What's Oxford?
Santa: So simple, Bail Gaadi.
Captain of Military: Naujawano aage bado;
Santa aage nahi bada;
Captain: tum aage kyu nahi bade?
Santa: Apne kaha 9 jawano aage bado, mein 10ve num pe tha!!
Santa Singh: What is the full form of singh?
Banta Singh: S-santa I-insaan N-nahi G-gadha H-hai.
Santa: My Father Dug The Suez Canal.
Banta: That's Nothing, Have You Heard Of Dead Sea?
Santa: Yes, I Have.
Banta:My Dad Killed It.
How can a Santa kill a Lion?
Santa thinks & thinks hard... & comes to a conclusion:
"I'll drink Poison... and let the Lion eat me."
Santa buys a new Pressure Cooker & next day he returns it.
Shopkeeper: Why are you returnng it?
Santa: Ghar me jawan beti hai, or ye sala seeti bajata hai
Santa 2 Police: Kal rath chor mere ghar se TV ke alava sab samaan le gaye
Police:TV kyon nahi legaya?
Santa:TV to mei dekh raha tha is liye.
Santa Singh ka 20 saal bad bacha hua.
Wo udas ho gaya.
Banta : Yaar udas kion ho?
Santa : 20 sal baad bacha huwa wo bhi itna sa.
Ek banda bhagta howa aata hay aur Santa se kehta hai bhai jaldi jao tumharey ghar main talaab ka pani ghus gaya hay.
Santa: Oye kion jhoot bolta hay, ghar ki chabi to meray paas hay.
American: In our country ,
marriage even takes place with email.
Santa: In India, it is only with a female
A Chini was in hospital.
SANTA went to meet him.
Chini said “CHING CHONG, MOU.CHU CHA” & died.
SANTA went china 2 know the meaning,
that was:-
KUTTE OXYGN K PIPE SE PAIR Utha
Santa found answer to the
most difficult question ever-
What comes first the chicken or the egg ?
O yaar, jiska order pehle doge, vo ayega !
Santa enters a store that sell curtains.
He tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains."
The salesman assured him that they had a large selection of pink curtains. He showed him several patterns, but Santa seemed to be having a hard time choosing.
Finally, he selects a lovely pink floral print.
The salesman asked what size curtains he needed.
Santa replies, "Fifteen inches."
"Fifteen inches?" asked the salesman. "That sounds very small, what room are they for?"
Santa tells him that they aren't for a room, they are for his computer monitor.
The surprised salesman replies, "But, sir, computers do not have curtains!"
Santa says, "Hellllooooooooo........I've got Windows!"
Interviewer : Give me the opposite words.
Banta Singh : Ok
Interviewer : Made in India
Banta Singh : Destroyed in Pakistan
Interviewer : Good… Keep it Up
Banta Singh : Bad…. Put it Down
Interviewer : Maxi Mum
Banta Singh : Mini Dad
Interviewer : Enough! Take your Seat
Banta Singh : Insufficient! Don’t take my seat
Interviewer : Idiot! Take your seat
Banta Singh : Clever! Don’t take my seat
Interviewer : I say you get out!
Banta Singh : You didn’t say I come in
Interviewer : I reject you!
Banta Singh : You appoint me
A lady asked Santa: LIPTON di chah hai?
Santa replied: Mainu ta nahi hai ji, tainu hai ta lipat ja…!
Banta was not home at his usual hour, and his wife, Preeto, was fuming, as the clock ticked later and later. Finally, about 3:00 AM she heard a noise at the front door, and as she stood at the top of the stairs, there was Banta, drunk as a skunk, trying to navigate the stairs.
"Do you realize what time it is?" she asked.
He answered, "Don't get excited. I'm late because I bought something for the house."
Immediately her attitude changed, and as she ran down the stairs to meet him halfway, she asked, "What did you buy for the house, dear?"
Banta's answer was, "A round of drinks!"
Girl: Will u marry me?
Santa: No, humare yahan shaadi sirf relatives mein hi hoti hai.
Mummy ne Papa se, Didi ne Jijaji se aur Bhaiya ne Bhabhi se
Banta: Yeh chaaku kyon ubaal rahe ho?
Santa: Suicide karne ke liye
Banta: To phir ubalne kui kya zaroorat hai?
Santa: Kahin infection na ho jaaye
By:Srk.........................
Keep Smiling....................
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